Mommy, I’m Human Too.

Sometimes my expectations of my four- year old daughter are unfair and superfluous. My expectations of her are rooted in my own inability to sometimes acknowledge and accept failure in my own life.

Since the coronavirus epidemic, schools have been closed, and students have been forced to remote learning. I can admit that homeschooling a toddler, who is gifted and talented, is not my expertise. Although watching her soar academically is rewarding; the aggressiveness that comes with homeschooling her is not so pleasant from her prespective.

Lately, my dialogue with her has had acerbic undertones and she has expressed more than once how this really hurts her feelings. I cannot be her teacher and her bully. The two personalities cannot co-exist and one must be annihilated because while one is beneficial; the other one is detrimental.

This morning conviction walloped me so hard that I had to stop, apologize to my daughter and do some deep soul searching.

Unbeknownst, we can become our child’s first bully. I refuse to repeat patterns of emotional neglect and verbal abuse. I give praise and honor to my God for allowing me to see the error of my ways so that I am not producing another broken black girl whose confidence was shattered by her mother’s hand

May God have mercy on me and may this short post inspire another mother to do some self-evaluation.